What is Positive Reinforcement?  It's a fancy term for something you already do!  Every time you give a child an encouraging word, a "thumbs up" for a job well done, a sticker for good work, a few minutes of special time alone with you, you are giving Positive Reinforcement!  As "nurturers", it just comes naturally to us.  However, sometimes we come across children who need a little bit extra, or may even need to be "tricked" into doing the right thing.  And there are some wonderfully powerful techniques which can be very successful with difficult children.  Here's an example....... Johnny has a very hard time sitting during morning circle.  He likes to get up, walk around the circle, make a little noise, try to distract the other kids.  Get the picture?  Sound familiar?  This is a great time to use Vicarious Reinforcement.  That's another fancy term, but here's how it works: as soon as Johnny starts acting up, you start giving some kind of reinforcement to the children who are acting appropriately.  This can be verbal ("I love how Jose and Kameela and Josh are sitting!").  This can be physical ("Let me give you five for being such wonderful listeners!")  This can entail pulling out something really special, (that you know Johnny loves) such as puppets, toys, or other items that aren't normally part of circle time and saying, for example: "You're all doing such a wonderful job so Mr. Sparky is here to say hello!"

The next example of vicarious reinforcement is very controversial because it involves food.  Let's face it....food is a powerful reinforcer.  Alot of us grown-ups still find food incredibly reinforcing.  For young children, food is a primary need.  They respond very directly to it.  Food is also concrete, something they understand.  It is what's called a Primary Reinforcer.  For those of you who feel philosophically comfortable with this, and whose program allows it, here is a typical way primary reinforcement works: when Johnny gets up and begins to become disruptive, pull out some "treats" (such as sugar-free gummi bears, apple jacks, small pieces of pretzel sticks, or anything else you think is appropriate) and hand them out to all who are behaving appropriately.  Make sure you couple the primary reinforcer with verbal praise ("Good Sitting!")  We are talking about very small portions here.....1 piece of whatever you're giving only!  Do you know that little kids can be tricked into believing that 1/2 a gummi bear tastes better than a whole one??!!  It's true!  One of my teachers has her children convinced that when you break a gummi bear in 1/2, it releases all the flavor to make it taste even better!  And they buy it!  What a wonderful portion control technique!

Whatever type of Vicarious Reinforcement you choose to use, you must also make sure to do the following:
1) Ignore Johnny.  As long as he is not in danger of harming himself or others, just let him be.  Chances are he's acting this way to get your attention, so don't give him what he wants.  He needs to be taught how to get attention in an appropriate way.
2) Be dramatic.  We're all actors, aren't we?!  This technique must be done in the most grand manner possible, so that Johnny picks up on what he's missing!
3) Be encouraging.  Talk about Johnny while he's "gone".  Say things like: "Gee I hope Johnny comes back to circle soon, I miss him." or "I hope Johnny knows that he can come back as soon as he's ready to do the right thing."
4) Be Rewarding.  This is the hardest one of all.  The second Johnny comes back to circle he must be reinforced!  Yup...you have to give him that gummi bear, or that turn with Mr. Sparky, or whatever it was you used to get him back.  It may hurt you, because chances are he has gotten on your last nerve, but all is lost if you don't make that connection between appropriate behavior and the reinforcer!  Even if he only hangs around for a few seconds, it's important to make that connection.  And if done consistently, Johnny will hang around circle time longer and longer each time.

Vicarious reinforcement will only work if used consistently by everybody!  It will also only work if the child has adequate cognitive skills to "pick up" on what's going on.  Also, you need to be sure that the disruptive behavior is not any more "fun" than what he/she is supposed to be doing (for example, if a child has left circle to go play in the block corner, obviously he'll be having more fun and not really care about the attention he's missing out on).
 

Juana easily loses her temper.  When not given her own way, she will throw herself on the floor and tantrum.  If a peer tries to take a toy away from her, Juana will hit, bite, kick, scratch....whatever it takes to get her way.  What can we do with Juana??!!

When it comes to temper tantrums, try to remember that all behavior, good or "bad" means something.  Typically, a tantrum means that a child wants you to give in to them after a request has been denied.  They are hoping against hope that if they cry, scream, bang loud enough, you will give in to them.  The key is: DON'T!!  This is a time for a technique called "Planned Ignoring".  Remember Johnny?  The same rule applies here.  Do not let the child know that you are aware of what they are doing.  Of course, you are keeping an eye on them at all times, but use those eyes at the back of your head in this situation!  As long as the child is safe and is not putting him/herself in danger of self-injury, pay no mind!  It is hard to ignore screaming, yelling, etc. and you must expect it to get worse before it gets better, but try your best to completely ignore it.  It is essential that EVERYBODY ignores the tantrum, even peers.  In my experience, teaching kids to say "I don't see her, I don't hear her" are effective key words to remind others to stay on track.  Juana will soon figure out that she is knocking herself out for nothing and that no one is going to give in to her if she acts this way.

Your job is to help her figure out ways to appropriately get your attention or to get her needs met.  The minute Juana begins to calm down, tell her you're glad she is calming down and ask her to "use her words" to tell you why she is so mad.  If Juana can't do this, give her some space, and try again in a few minutes.  Always let her know that you are there to help her when she is ready.  When she is completely calm, try talking to her about what happened.  You may have to describe the incident for her.  Try to give her words that she can use next time she feels upset or other pro-social strategies to avoid another tantrum.  Role-playing what happened, with an appropriate ending, is also useful.

The important thing to remember is that all negative-attention seeking behaviors, provided that they are not "dangerous", should be ignored.  Remember that if you pay attention at these times, you are further increasing the chances that this behavior will happen again and again.  Use the vicarious reinforcement technique described above in conjunction with planned ignoring.  That is a very powerful and effective combination.
 

There is just no way around this one.....hurting oneself or others is unacceptable.  This is the most appropriate time to use Time Out.  Time Out is a wonderful technique.  The problem is, it is often mis-used.  We've all read the articles in the magazines that give you rules of thumb such as: time out should last 1-minute for each year of the child's life.  But do you know what the problem is with giving a four year old a four minute time out?!  More often than not they will forget why they were put in time out in the first place!!  If a child loses the connection between behavior and consequence, the chance for the "teachable moment" is gone!!  So, here are some very simple rules of thumb that I would like to recommend.  Some are going to surprise you, but let me say here that these techniques work with severely emotionally disturbed pre-schoolers, so chances are pretty good you will have some success as well!
1) Time Out should be used only for one specific misbehavior, usually aggression of some sort.
2) Time Out must occur immediately following the behavior.
3) Time Out should begin with you making a statement about why they are there: "You hit, you sit".
4) Time Out should be 100% non-reinforcing for a child.  Once you make that brief statement at the beginning, do not speak to the child again.
5) Time Out should not begin until the child is calm.  If he/she is tantrumming, tell them that you cannot start their time until they are calm.
6)Once the child is sitting calmly, the actual time out can begin.  And guess what?  The actual time that elapses is TEN SECONDS!!  That's right!  A simple count to ten for or with the child is all that's needed!  Again, remember that little kids aren't so good with remembering yet, so keep it brief.
7) When the counting is done, remind the child why he/she was in time out.
8)Immediately re-direct the child back into the activity taking place.